It is neither common nor uncommon for two consenting adults from completely different generations to engage in a relationship. Relationships that seemed taboo thirty years ago barely register on the shock barometer these days. Although the romantic veil has been dropped and couples are more likely to display their affection for one another, it’s hardly a new concept. Old guys and young women were part of amorousness history long before Hugh Hefner published his first Playboy magazine almost sixty years ago. It not unusual to see couples with a wide margin in age, mostly older men with women, but that’s not always the case. A powerful statement is being made by the feminist movement which is making its mark on the lifestyle with “cougars’ landed their prey for either temporary entertainment or some for long-term romance with more and more frequently. Whether it’s some fit, handsome older dude with a young babe or a sexy and confident older lady with a young hunk, certain “Truths” will prevail in this relationship, and how the couple deals with these unavoidable factors, will usually determine the longevity and success of the relationship. If you’re looking to date then first have a good read of this article and then head over to sexymeets to find a date
STRIKE #1…You will be Scorned:
Regardless of how ‘Hip’ the particular culture you have surrounded yourself with including local dating in your country, people will stare. Some stare out of jealousy while others stare out of disgust; either way, it’s always present, so prepare yourself for it. Rarely does anyone have the guts to say anything, but if they do, it’s best to leave it alone. You have absolutely nothing to gain by debating with them, and if their comment is on the positive side such as ‘way to go, man,’ acknowledging it is only showing disrespect for your partner, As mentioned, the best policy is to ignore any comment. Unfortunately, dealing with public scorn is not something the younger ½ of the relationship is proficient in. Because of the reasons mentioned later, they will have more difficulty overlooking the attention. My advice is to focus your energy on making them feel safe and secure in who they are. It’s productive to acknowledge the attention as outside influencers and at the same time reinforce how your special bond allows you the freedom from needing to judge others.
STRIKE #2…You are at Different Places in the Lifecycle:
Notwithstanding the commonalities, you might share with your partner, you can’t change the past and the past makes-up who you are. What issues may be common at the moment might not always be true. You can’t expect someone to understand your perspective on a matter when they have never experienced or even been exposed to that issue. What one person in the relationship has lived through life’s challenges, and the other is just now gaining a fresh perspective to a matter, tensions are going to rise. Don’t expect the inexperienced partner to take the word of the person who’s lived it. They have their right of opinion, so don’t get frustrated with a different view of an issue when it presented. At the same time, respect the voice of reason. Listen to the person who has ‘been there, done that’ and realize something’s to be learned from the incident. Bottom line is to find a compromise. Both people involved need to see through the eyes of the other person and communicate your feelings more positively and productively.
STRIKE #3…Don’t Fall into the Parent Trap:
Even though I say ‘Don’t do it,” this pitfall is almost inevitable. Look at the facts. One person is younger than the other. The other person has cultivated a behavioral routine based on past experiences and what works and what doesn’t. It’s only a matter of time when the younger partner attempts to do something a certain way that the older partner KNOWS isn’t going to work. For example, leaving a dish-washing sponge in the sink is positively asking an army of bacteria to set-up camp in the cleaning equipment, so when you go to wash the next dishes, you’re dispersing disease all over your dinnerware, or giving bad head 🙂 After reminding your partner of this several times even you can hear your parents in your voice. Or, how about putting back anything that they have taken out for whatever reason? I can hear my dad’s voice when I said, “why don’t you put this back where you got it?” This can only do damage to a relationship because, as far as your younger partner hears, it is their parent complaining to them as if they were teenagers again. There is only one very difficult solution to this matter…DON’T SAY ANYTHING…it’s not worth it! Believe me, it’s much easier to take that sponge out of the sink and set it in an area to dry, or to put back the books they took out for research and left on the desk then sound like their parents. You may already LOOK like their parents, don’t SOUND like them too. Again, in the Grand Scheme of things, it’s not that big a deal. It will become a new part of your routine you must cultivate, and when you do, calmness emerges.
As you can see, this is not an easy task before you, but then again, is any relationship? Relationships with age differences do present its particular obstacles, and anyone should be aware of these.